A lot of people are bored right now. I've noticed a certain listlessness in my compatriots, and even myself. It happens, I guess, this close to an expansion. We've had nearly two years to play through this content and being married to K and her altism, I've seen everything at least 7 times.
With that said, people who still play are doing what they can to stay energized. The patch may help (Oct. 14th for those that don't know) and it'll certainly give me something to do as I learn my new specs. Yeah, I said specs. I don't intend to level as holy, hopefully giving Blizzard enough time to fix what I view as some real holes in the Holy spec. I think Holy is a weak, weak tree. Still, I'm a holy paladin at heart so no matter, I hit 80, it's Holy for me.
Anyway! People are moving around. Some leave smaller guilds for 25-man content, or to try to PvP their asses off. It's understandable, at least from my perspective, but it's probably very trying to guild leaders and small guilds to understand since they will see the flux of people most.
Just keep your heads down, keep doing what you do, and when Lich King hits you'll have guild stability again. This time, even, I don't think you'll see that kind of flux at 80. Not with the 10-man content running parallel to 25-man stuff. Small guilds should rejoice over that decision by Blizzard.
Still in my guild, disagreeing when I do! *gasp*
Friday, October 3, 2008
Thursday, September 25, 2008
What makes a paladin?
When asked why he climbed Mt. Everest, a paladin replied "because it was there."
It is this kind of spirit that makes a paladin a paladin.
We are the bold and the brave, the elite and the 1337. We are the line that cannot be crossed so long as we stand. We are the hammer and shield, the light and the way.
Essentially this all boils down into one word, which should be used from here on out to describe paladins (although sometimes not ret paladins) thoroughly. The word?
Awesome.
If a paladin were polymorphed into cake, which kind of cake would he be? Easy. He'd be strawberry cake with strawberry icing. Why? Because that kind of cake is awesome.
If a paladin were polymorphed into a hot female movie star, who would it be? Easy. Helen Hunt. Why? Because she's awesome.
In the coming weeks I'll hopefully be talking a lot about how to be a proper paladin, what kind of gear you'll need, what kind of attitude you'll need, and the appropriate and meek style and philosophy that makes us so awesome.
I will not ATTEMPT to flame anyone or any class here (again except probably ret paladins) but, since some of you reading this probably don't have a paladin, you'll feel flamed. This is simply because you don't have the degree of awesomeness that a paladin has, which would provide you with a bubble to keep the flames from hurting you.
Hmmm, that's something. I think I know what a paladin's bubble is now made of.
No guesses?
It's made of awesome. No wonder my bubble works better than other paladins (like ret paladins).
Off to ponder this, and mock ret paladins. (and maybe ret paladins)
It is this kind of spirit that makes a paladin a paladin.
We are the bold and the brave, the elite and the 1337. We are the line that cannot be crossed so long as we stand. We are the hammer and shield, the light and the way.
Essentially this all boils down into one word, which should be used from here on out to describe paladins (although sometimes not ret paladins) thoroughly. The word?
Awesome.
If a paladin were polymorphed into cake, which kind of cake would he be? Easy. He'd be strawberry cake with strawberry icing. Why? Because that kind of cake is awesome.
If a paladin were polymorphed into a hot female movie star, who would it be? Easy. Helen Hunt. Why? Because she's awesome.
In the coming weeks I'll hopefully be talking a lot about how to be a proper paladin, what kind of gear you'll need, what kind of attitude you'll need, and the appropriate and meek style and philosophy that makes us so awesome.
I will not ATTEMPT to flame anyone or any class here (again except probably ret paladins) but, since some of you reading this probably don't have a paladin, you'll feel flamed. This is simply because you don't have the degree of awesomeness that a paladin has, which would provide you with a bubble to keep the flames from hurting you.
Hmmm, that's something. I think I know what a paladin's bubble is now made of.
No guesses?
It's made of awesome. No wonder my bubble works better than other paladins (like ret paladins).
Off to ponder this, and mock ret paladins. (and maybe ret paladins)
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
On forces...
I'm a stubborn man. It comes with being someone who has convictions, and the need/desire to stand by them, come hell or high water, as long as I believe in them.
I don't fold at poker often. I don't back down in the face of adversity and I don't give an inch if I think you're wrong.
I'm an Immovable Force.
When two people who are Immovable Forces are together, there isn't really an issue. Both people will stick to their ideals and beliefs without interfering with each other and can usually get along very well.
There is another type of stubborn person, however. The type that is a leader, or is forced to be a leader, and thus has influence over others. You'll notice that I'm not painting this type of person with a negative connotation. I don't believe that all of these type of person are bad, or wrong, or evil.
They are Unstoppable Forces.
Most Unstoppables are good people with good intentions. Unfortunately the bad Unstoppables are the most extreme, rude, disgusting people you've ever met. You know the types. They're the ones that bully a group at group outings, insist that whatever is going to be done (in a group setting) is going to be what THEY want to do, or else. They're the type that will tell someone sharing a belief how incredibly wrong and stupid they are.
I knew a few Unstoppable Forces like that, and am lucky to have distanced myself from them. I can safely say that today there aren't any of these kind in my life.
That isn't to say that I don't know a few Unstoppable Forces. I know plenty of them, and I'm lucky to know them.
You're probably seeing where I'm going with this.
What happens when an Unstoppable Force meets up with an Immovable Object?
Everything changes. Friends aren't friends, groups of people splinter into factions, guilds disband, and tempers run high. If left unchecked, people will choose sides, and unless something changes, war will begin.
A war like that is unwinnable for either force. It may seem like common sense when written here, in plain text, with unheated blood and calmness in mind. But when the blood is up, when tempers flare, that war seems not only winnable, but inevitable.
The only real way to succeed when an Immovable Force meets an Unstoppable Force is for one, or both, to move. An Unstoppable doesn't have to go in one line, it can change directions without being stopped. It can shift course, bend, and continue on without any damage done. An Immovable can do the same thing, in its own way, by moving aside. It can still be immovable, but in a slightly different place, and continue to be what it is.
So the answer to my question is easy.
When an Immovable Object meets an Unstoppable Force, the world ends.
Unless they both choose to compromise.
If that happens, the world wins.
So if you're an Unstoppable, or if you're like me an Immovable, please consider this and help the world you live in to win. You'll like those consequences much more than when the world ends.
I hope you're all having great adventures right now. ^^ I'll see you in the world.
P.S. As an aside, anyone who thinks that someone should leave a guild if they disagree with the Guild Leader would have really enjoyed Nazi Germany. And France. I choose to stay in a guild I care about, and try to make changes and compromises for the better. Cheers!
I don't fold at poker often. I don't back down in the face of adversity and I don't give an inch if I think you're wrong.
I'm an Immovable Force.
When two people who are Immovable Forces are together, there isn't really an issue. Both people will stick to their ideals and beliefs without interfering with each other and can usually get along very well.
There is another type of stubborn person, however. The type that is a leader, or is forced to be a leader, and thus has influence over others. You'll notice that I'm not painting this type of person with a negative connotation. I don't believe that all of these type of person are bad, or wrong, or evil.
They are Unstoppable Forces.
Most Unstoppables are good people with good intentions. Unfortunately the bad Unstoppables are the most extreme, rude, disgusting people you've ever met. You know the types. They're the ones that bully a group at group outings, insist that whatever is going to be done (in a group setting) is going to be what THEY want to do, or else. They're the type that will tell someone sharing a belief how incredibly wrong and stupid they are.
I knew a few Unstoppable Forces like that, and am lucky to have distanced myself from them. I can safely say that today there aren't any of these kind in my life.
That isn't to say that I don't know a few Unstoppable Forces. I know plenty of them, and I'm lucky to know them.
You're probably seeing where I'm going with this.
What happens when an Unstoppable Force meets up with an Immovable Object?
Everything changes. Friends aren't friends, groups of people splinter into factions, guilds disband, and tempers run high. If left unchecked, people will choose sides, and unless something changes, war will begin.
A war like that is unwinnable for either force. It may seem like common sense when written here, in plain text, with unheated blood and calmness in mind. But when the blood is up, when tempers flare, that war seems not only winnable, but inevitable.
The only real way to succeed when an Immovable Force meets an Unstoppable Force is for one, or both, to move. An Unstoppable doesn't have to go in one line, it can change directions without being stopped. It can shift course, bend, and continue on without any damage done. An Immovable can do the same thing, in its own way, by moving aside. It can still be immovable, but in a slightly different place, and continue to be what it is.
So the answer to my question is easy.
When an Immovable Object meets an Unstoppable Force, the world ends.
Unless they both choose to compromise.
If that happens, the world wins.
So if you're an Unstoppable, or if you're like me an Immovable, please consider this and help the world you live in to win. You'll like those consequences much more than when the world ends.
I hope you're all having great adventures right now. ^^ I'll see you in the world.
P.S. As an aside, anyone who thinks that someone should leave a guild if they disagree with the Guild Leader would have really enjoyed Nazi Germany. And France. I choose to stay in a guild I care about, and try to make changes and compromises for the better. Cheers!
Roll the end credits...
A while back now the Knights of Utopia had a rift form in them. Raiders vs. non-raiders. Progression vs. Inclusion. The rift was so bad that quite a few of the leaders left, and we stayed behind to pick up the pieces. We had a good leader, a good raid leader, and officers that apparantly knew their job roles.
We cleared Karazhan our first night as the new KoU. We stand at 4/6 in ZA, full clearing Kara, and our first steps into Gruul's/Mag's is tomorrow.
In the process I lost two friends whom I love. I've been flamed in-game and out. Hell, there's even a blog about me up now telling me that I should have left rather than do what I did.
The price for raiding is far too high for someone like me to pay. It isn't worth it. Anyone reading this, anyone in a small guild that's wondering if they should push beyond Karazhan or not. My advice? The loot isn't worth that feeling you have right now, that feeling of community, of fellowship. The friends you have now are worth more than the loot you'll get. PuG the rest.
In the end, when all is said and done, I'd like to be remembered for what I accomplished, where I went, who I helped, who benefited from me being there. At this point it's lesser than it was, but sometimes that's just how it ends.
I've decided that, at least for now until Lich King, the adventures of this Guardian Knight are finished. I'd like to leave with as much dignity as I can muster, so I won't return flames or say hurtful things to those who've done so to me. When the game comes up, soon as I can, Boon'll go as quietly as possible back to his old guild, where he was always going to go when I retired. I'll put on my old tabard, smile at it because I've always been partial to it, and then I'm going to log off and leave all of this where it belongs.
Take care, fellow WoW'ers. I hope you have great adventures.
We cleared Karazhan our first night as the new KoU. We stand at 4/6 in ZA, full clearing Kara, and our first steps into Gruul's/Mag's is tomorrow.
In the process I lost two friends whom I love. I've been flamed in-game and out. Hell, there's even a blog about me up now telling me that I should have left rather than do what I did.
The price for raiding is far too high for someone like me to pay. It isn't worth it. Anyone reading this, anyone in a small guild that's wondering if they should push beyond Karazhan or not. My advice? The loot isn't worth that feeling you have right now, that feeling of community, of fellowship. The friends you have now are worth more than the loot you'll get. PuG the rest.
In the end, when all is said and done, I'd like to be remembered for what I accomplished, where I went, who I helped, who benefited from me being there. At this point it's lesser than it was, but sometimes that's just how it ends.
I've decided that, at least for now until Lich King, the adventures of this Guardian Knight are finished. I'd like to leave with as much dignity as I can muster, so I won't return flames or say hurtful things to those who've done so to me. When the game comes up, soon as I can, Boon'll go as quietly as possible back to his old guild, where he was always going to go when I retired. I'll put on my old tabard, smile at it because I've always been partial to it, and then I'm going to log off and leave all of this where it belongs.
Take care, fellow WoW'ers. I hope you have great adventures.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
I am The Dark Knight...
I should warn you. If you haven't seen The Dark Knight, and if you're pretty good at catching inferences, you might want to stop reading if you want to avoid some spoilers. As it stands, I'll do my best to stay as far away from them as I can, but a warning is still in order. Fair warning!
In our day to day lives, each of us is Lt. Jim Gordon. Simple guy, daily grind, working his ass off to do what he thinks is the right thing to be doing. In our own worlds, each of us is a good person, each of us is strong and moral, each of us can make light of situations, be serious, you probably get the picture. No one dislikes Jim Gordon, and if you do, well, you have some issues. He's the good guy, as I truly believe most of us want to be.
Problem is... in the movies at least, nothing really that bad happens to Jim Gordon. He witnesses things and so, from a safe distance, experiences the pain of others. He truly cares for the people that are hurt in the grinder that is Gotham City. And at the end of the day, when he kisses his wife hello and checks on his sleeping children, he breathes a sigh of relief at that safe distance.
The trouble, the dark truth of the matter, is that none of us get to STAY Jim Gordon. If it hasn't happened yet (please be thankful), it WILL happen. This isn't a blog about the impending doom on the horizon, though, so while I think it needs to be pointed out, stay with me and I will show you hope. Promise.
Something happens to our Jim Gordons. There is a moment of pain, or a long, endurance marathon of suffering, and we hurt from it. Maybe it's the loss of a loved one, or the destruction of a relationship, or a personal illness. It doesn't even have to be anything so terrible as these, maybe you lost your job, or maybe you're fighting with friends, or maybe you just did something you regret and don't know how to say you're sorry... the point is, you're wounded somehow. And every wound leaves a mark...
The Joker takes his scars, the things that he's suffered in his life, and he magnifies them. His pain will be THEIR pain, he paints over the suffering, but maybe as a means to hide it, or maybe to flaunt it. To make sure everyone knows what happened, or at least that something did. In his world the pain has taken all meaning from his actions and he lives only to hurt those who don't hurt as much as he does. His story constantly changes about HOW he got his scars, and this can be a defense mechanism, or it can represent those people who will ALWAYS find a reason to be hurting, a reason to be hurting other people, or a reason to NOT be doing the right thing, simply because life has been "unfair" to them. You become the Joker by choice and deed, both of which go hand in hand. It's easy to lash out at the world if you're hurting, but it makes you nothing but a cancer because you will simply reproduce your pain, over and over and over again, and onto the people closest to you, until it destroys everything around you.
Two-Face was driven by a need to do the right thing. "We either die a hero or we live long enough to become the villain." When he was faced with personal pain, tragedy, and suffering, when it disfigured him and ruined his "perfect image" of himself, he lashed out at those he saw who WEREN'T suffering like he was. Instead of rising above his pain, instead of mastering it, overcoming it, he chose to let his pain manipulate him into trying to drag everyone else around him down to his level. To me, he is like a drowning victim who no longer cares HOW they live, as long as they do, and they will literally pull someone who is trying to save them down below the water level if it means they can push upwards and steal another breath of air. Two-Face had great intentions, and as long as things went his way, he could accomplish great things. He was handsome, dashing, and charismatic... but only on the one side. When he faced REAL adversity... like the flip of the coin that he so tends to favor... he could really go either way.
Batman. Early on Batman's world of safety, comfort, and wealth was shattered. He had everything he could ever have wanted and was as happy as anyone could possibly be. His parents were killed in front of him. He watched them bleed to death from gunshot wounds. This represents, to me, the worst kinds of emotional suffering and pain that someone can be exposed to. This happened when he was most vulnerable, it happened suddenly and when the shock of it wore off, he was faced with the same exact choices that Joker and Two-Face had to make. How to react and deal with the introduction of pain and suffering and hardship to his life. Sure, his is a dark path, and he has moments of rage, and anguish, and despair, the same as you and I do when we are suffering. But unlike the other two examples, Batman took his pain, took his hardship, and he focused it, harnessed it, into something he could use to inspire other people, regardless of what had happened to him. And while he deals with his own pain in a rather unique way... it isn't the gadgets, it isn't the suit, or the car... it comes down to the simple choice he made to help others from what happened to him that makes him a hero, and makes the other two examples villains.
Batman is obviously my favorite hero and so I'm biased. There's a line in "Batman Begins" where Gordon says something along the lines of "I don't know how to thank you", and Batman replies, "And you'll never have to."
We are each Jim Gordon, and at some point in the future, possibly as soon as right as you sit at this computer, you will be faced with a choice. How to deal with your pain.
You can go the easy route of the Joker, which I'll admit is tempting... you hurt so much less when you're hurting others, or when you're ignoring your pain in the hopes that it'll go away by covering it up with a ton of makeup (which does nothing more than accentuate, to those who know how to look, that you're hurting).
You can be Two-Face, and stop doing the good things that you would normally do because they're harder now, in light of the pain you're going through, and the good things that you've done in the past run the risk of being tainted from it. People remember what you do, and good people remember farther back and farther back in the past, but it is still the present that people remember the most clearly. If you choose to be Two-Face... you're doing more damage to yourself than you know.
Or you can be The Dark Knight, and you can work through the pain, you can do what you know is right BECAUSE it's right, you can reach out and try to help others who are also in need, you can find the lesson in your sufferings (because there is ALWAYS a lesson), and then you can teach that lesson to others. You can be a hero... and all you have to do, really, is decide...
...that you will be.
The outfit, the gadgets, and the car are really just perks after that!
(P.S. For anyone thinking that I'm a completely oblivious moron, let me just say that I'm in no way saying that I'm always going to make the choice to be Batman over the other two. For the most part we're all Jim Gordon, and there are times I've been Joker or Two-Face instead... but the more often I choose to be Batman, the easier it seems to get, and the stronger I get at making that decision the next time... and the better off the people around me tend to be. Think on it!)
In our day to day lives, each of us is Lt. Jim Gordon. Simple guy, daily grind, working his ass off to do what he thinks is the right thing to be doing. In our own worlds, each of us is a good person, each of us is strong and moral, each of us can make light of situations, be serious, you probably get the picture. No one dislikes Jim Gordon, and if you do, well, you have some issues. He's the good guy, as I truly believe most of us want to be.
Problem is... in the movies at least, nothing really that bad happens to Jim Gordon. He witnesses things and so, from a safe distance, experiences the pain of others. He truly cares for the people that are hurt in the grinder that is Gotham City. And at the end of the day, when he kisses his wife hello and checks on his sleeping children, he breathes a sigh of relief at that safe distance.
The trouble, the dark truth of the matter, is that none of us get to STAY Jim Gordon. If it hasn't happened yet (please be thankful), it WILL happen. This isn't a blog about the impending doom on the horizon, though, so while I think it needs to be pointed out, stay with me and I will show you hope. Promise.
Something happens to our Jim Gordons. There is a moment of pain, or a long, endurance marathon of suffering, and we hurt from it. Maybe it's the loss of a loved one, or the destruction of a relationship, or a personal illness. It doesn't even have to be anything so terrible as these, maybe you lost your job, or maybe you're fighting with friends, or maybe you just did something you regret and don't know how to say you're sorry... the point is, you're wounded somehow. And every wound leaves a mark...
The Joker takes his scars, the things that he's suffered in his life, and he magnifies them. His pain will be THEIR pain, he paints over the suffering, but maybe as a means to hide it, or maybe to flaunt it. To make sure everyone knows what happened, or at least that something did. In his world the pain has taken all meaning from his actions and he lives only to hurt those who don't hurt as much as he does. His story constantly changes about HOW he got his scars, and this can be a defense mechanism, or it can represent those people who will ALWAYS find a reason to be hurting, a reason to be hurting other people, or a reason to NOT be doing the right thing, simply because life has been "unfair" to them. You become the Joker by choice and deed, both of which go hand in hand. It's easy to lash out at the world if you're hurting, but it makes you nothing but a cancer because you will simply reproduce your pain, over and over and over again, and onto the people closest to you, until it destroys everything around you.
Two-Face was driven by a need to do the right thing. "We either die a hero or we live long enough to become the villain." When he was faced with personal pain, tragedy, and suffering, when it disfigured him and ruined his "perfect image" of himself, he lashed out at those he saw who WEREN'T suffering like he was. Instead of rising above his pain, instead of mastering it, overcoming it, he chose to let his pain manipulate him into trying to drag everyone else around him down to his level. To me, he is like a drowning victim who no longer cares HOW they live, as long as they do, and they will literally pull someone who is trying to save them down below the water level if it means they can push upwards and steal another breath of air. Two-Face had great intentions, and as long as things went his way, he could accomplish great things. He was handsome, dashing, and charismatic... but only on the one side. When he faced REAL adversity... like the flip of the coin that he so tends to favor... he could really go either way.
Batman. Early on Batman's world of safety, comfort, and wealth was shattered. He had everything he could ever have wanted and was as happy as anyone could possibly be. His parents were killed in front of him. He watched them bleed to death from gunshot wounds. This represents, to me, the worst kinds of emotional suffering and pain that someone can be exposed to. This happened when he was most vulnerable, it happened suddenly and when the shock of it wore off, he was faced with the same exact choices that Joker and Two-Face had to make. How to react and deal with the introduction of pain and suffering and hardship to his life. Sure, his is a dark path, and he has moments of rage, and anguish, and despair, the same as you and I do when we are suffering. But unlike the other two examples, Batman took his pain, took his hardship, and he focused it, harnessed it, into something he could use to inspire other people, regardless of what had happened to him. And while he deals with his own pain in a rather unique way... it isn't the gadgets, it isn't the suit, or the car... it comes down to the simple choice he made to help others from what happened to him that makes him a hero, and makes the other two examples villains.
Batman is obviously my favorite hero and so I'm biased. There's a line in "Batman Begins" where Gordon says something along the lines of "I don't know how to thank you", and Batman replies, "And you'll never have to."
We are each Jim Gordon, and at some point in the future, possibly as soon as right as you sit at this computer, you will be faced with a choice. How to deal with your pain.
You can go the easy route of the Joker, which I'll admit is tempting... you hurt so much less when you're hurting others, or when you're ignoring your pain in the hopes that it'll go away by covering it up with a ton of makeup (which does nothing more than accentuate, to those who know how to look, that you're hurting).
You can be Two-Face, and stop doing the good things that you would normally do because they're harder now, in light of the pain you're going through, and the good things that you've done in the past run the risk of being tainted from it. People remember what you do, and good people remember farther back and farther back in the past, but it is still the present that people remember the most clearly. If you choose to be Two-Face... you're doing more damage to yourself than you know.
Or you can be The Dark Knight, and you can work through the pain, you can do what you know is right BECAUSE it's right, you can reach out and try to help others who are also in need, you can find the lesson in your sufferings (because there is ALWAYS a lesson), and then you can teach that lesson to others. You can be a hero... and all you have to do, really, is decide...
...that you will be.
The outfit, the gadgets, and the car are really just perks after that!
(P.S. For anyone thinking that I'm a completely oblivious moron, let me just say that I'm in no way saying that I'm always going to make the choice to be Batman over the other two. For the most part we're all Jim Gordon, and there are times I've been Joker or Two-Face instead... but the more often I choose to be Batman, the easier it seems to get, and the stronger I get at making that decision the next time... and the better off the people around me tend to be. Think on it!)
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
A pinch of wisdom for the recipe of a good life...
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives...
Be kind anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you...
Be honest and frank anyway.
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered...
Forgive them anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight...
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous...
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow...
Do good anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.
"The Paradoxical Commandments" -- Kent Keith
Be kind anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you...
Be honest and frank anyway.
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered...
Forgive them anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight...
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous...
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow...
Do good anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.
"The Paradoxical Commandments" -- Kent Keith
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Oh ho ho ho!
You know those times when you go on vacation for a week?
You know those times when you go on vacation for a week and your wife knows your password?
You know those times when you go on vacation for a week, your wife knows your password, and she has EVIL INFLUENCES IN GAME THAT PERSUADE HER TO PUT YOU IN OGRIMMAR, IN A DRESS, WITHOUT YOUR HEARTHSTONE?!
You know those times you have all summer to get revenge?
You will. ;)
You know those times when you go on vacation for a week and your wife knows your password?
You know those times when you go on vacation for a week, your wife knows your password, and she has EVIL INFLUENCES IN GAME THAT PERSUADE HER TO PUT YOU IN OGRIMMAR, IN A DRESS, WITHOUT YOUR HEARTHSTONE?!
You know those times you have all summer to get revenge?
You will. ;)
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Crossing the Cheyenne Line...
The Ataris -- The Cheyenne Line
"You say this is the end
I know it's not the end
I took a picture
of heaven when we broke down
across the shining light
I never will forget
the color of last night
over us.
We missed the point in living
so caught up in this moment
we threw out all convictions
and traded them for substance
this life we hold so dear
will fade in...
time spend wasted on a lie
it's time you found some frame of mind
this life you hold so near
will fade in time."
I heard this song the other day, or rather, I watched this song since I found a video of it on Youtube. Pretty cool WoW video, if you're a fan of the game, you should search for the /dance video, it's really, really good. As is this song!
I think I finally found a term for something I've been wanting to write about for a while now. There are times, in our lives, when we think that we can't do something. Or we know that we can, but it'll take everything we've got, and then maybe a little more. Still, there's a line in our minds, a boundary that we know exists, and we're NOT sure if we can actually succeed if our endeavors take us past this line. I'm going to start calling it the Cheyenne Line because I think it's appropriate.
For instance, this past week our basement flooded. Our car died. A part of my knee is dead (which isn't scary, but is painful, but is also kind of cool because I have a zombie knee). And you'd think, with all of that happening, I'd just want to curl up and go to sleep. I'd be lying to say I didn't want to at times, especially yesterday, boy did yesterday suck, but ... I'm not broken down. I crossed my own Cheyenne Line, and I know when I did it.
Two days ago, while Jenn and I were working our asses off in the basement, I looked at our rolled up 15x10 soggy carpet and realized someone had to get that thing out of there. Jenn tried, while I watched, and it was just too damn heavy. To be honest, at the time, I wasn't exactly sure if I could do it, or even help with it. But, and I'm sure glad Jenn didn't record it as it must have looked about the most foolish thing in the world, I took a hold of that thing and dragged it up out of the basement and out onto the driveway, myself.
I think it's the hardest I've pushed myself since the initial surgeries, and I succeeded, if only just barely. I'm being honest about that, I think it was about the extremity of my ability now, but I took a heavy piece of wet carpet UP stairs, with a bum knee that they say should be replaced, hurting. Dead in spots.
Afterwards, I just kind of sat down in the chair for a bit and marveled at exactly how much I hurt, and how good it felt to be hurting so much. I'm sure, while that's probably the weirdest terminology to use, that each of you reading it understands it completely.
So, there I was, crossing that line, and ever since, I've felt this determination inside. There are things out there that can break your heart, there are things out there that can fill you with doubt about who you are, what you believe in, practically anything any of us value about ourselves. And that's perfectly natural, for all of us, to have these doubts.
The point, though, is that if I had started out dragging that carpet thinking I probably couldn't do it... there's no way I would have. If you want to know the secret of crossing the Cheyenne Line, that's it right there. You have to remove all doubt, you have to trust in yourself, in who you are, in what you believe, and ...pull. Lift. Struggle. Strive upwards. Jenn was at the top of those stairs. She was counting on me, she was waiting for me, she needed me to do this.
It was just a dirty carpet coming out of a basement. It was also a testament of the very core of who I want to be, who I try to be. It was putting my worries and pain aside for the good of something bigger than myself, for someone else. I didn't succeed because I was strong enough (as my knee and back can attest today, oooowwww), I succeeded because I BELIEVED strong enough.
Crossing the Cheyenne Line isn't easy. It never will be easy, no matter how many times you do it. Sometimes you'll try and not make it. Just remember to close your eyes, picture your own Jennifer at the top of those stairs... and give it all. Be truly alive, while you can. Forget if you failed yesterday, and remember that it isn't always what you do first, but often what we do LAST that makes the biggest difference.
There's always time to try again.
"You say this is the end
I know it's not the end
I took a picture
of heaven when we broke down
across the shining light
I never will forget
the color of last night
over us.
We missed the point in living
so caught up in this moment
we threw out all convictions
and traded them for substance
this life we hold so dear
will fade in...
time spend wasted on a lie
it's time you found some frame of mind
this life you hold so near
will fade in time."
I heard this song the other day, or rather, I watched this song since I found a video of it on Youtube. Pretty cool WoW video, if you're a fan of the game, you should search for the /dance video, it's really, really good. As is this song!
I think I finally found a term for something I've been wanting to write about for a while now. There are times, in our lives, when we think that we can't do something. Or we know that we can, but it'll take everything we've got, and then maybe a little more. Still, there's a line in our minds, a boundary that we know exists, and we're NOT sure if we can actually succeed if our endeavors take us past this line. I'm going to start calling it the Cheyenne Line because I think it's appropriate.
For instance, this past week our basement flooded. Our car died. A part of my knee is dead (which isn't scary, but is painful, but is also kind of cool because I have a zombie knee). And you'd think, with all of that happening, I'd just want to curl up and go to sleep. I'd be lying to say I didn't want to at times, especially yesterday, boy did yesterday suck, but ... I'm not broken down. I crossed my own Cheyenne Line, and I know when I did it.
Two days ago, while Jenn and I were working our asses off in the basement, I looked at our rolled up 15x10 soggy carpet and realized someone had to get that thing out of there. Jenn tried, while I watched, and it was just too damn heavy. To be honest, at the time, I wasn't exactly sure if I could do it, or even help with it. But, and I'm sure glad Jenn didn't record it as it must have looked about the most foolish thing in the world, I took a hold of that thing and dragged it up out of the basement and out onto the driveway, myself.
I think it's the hardest I've pushed myself since the initial surgeries, and I succeeded, if only just barely. I'm being honest about that, I think it was about the extremity of my ability now, but I took a heavy piece of wet carpet UP stairs, with a bum knee that they say should be replaced, hurting. Dead in spots.
Afterwards, I just kind of sat down in the chair for a bit and marveled at exactly how much I hurt, and how good it felt to be hurting so much. I'm sure, while that's probably the weirdest terminology to use, that each of you reading it understands it completely.
So, there I was, crossing that line, and ever since, I've felt this determination inside. There are things out there that can break your heart, there are things out there that can fill you with doubt about who you are, what you believe in, practically anything any of us value about ourselves. And that's perfectly natural, for all of us, to have these doubts.
The point, though, is that if I had started out dragging that carpet thinking I probably couldn't do it... there's no way I would have. If you want to know the secret of crossing the Cheyenne Line, that's it right there. You have to remove all doubt, you have to trust in yourself, in who you are, in what you believe, and ...pull. Lift. Struggle. Strive upwards. Jenn was at the top of those stairs. She was counting on me, she was waiting for me, she needed me to do this.
It was just a dirty carpet coming out of a basement. It was also a testament of the very core of who I want to be, who I try to be. It was putting my worries and pain aside for the good of something bigger than myself, for someone else. I didn't succeed because I was strong enough (as my knee and back can attest today, oooowwww), I succeeded because I BELIEVED strong enough.
Crossing the Cheyenne Line isn't easy. It never will be easy, no matter how many times you do it. Sometimes you'll try and not make it. Just remember to close your eyes, picture your own Jennifer at the top of those stairs... and give it all. Be truly alive, while you can. Forget if you failed yesterday, and remember that it isn't always what you do first, but often what we do LAST that makes the biggest difference.
There's always time to try again.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
These are my friends...
I've been playing WoW for years now. Literally. K and I were there at launch, we've survived attacks of elementals, the scourge army invasion, and Brewfest. While my wife's alts eclipse my own in their number, I still have my fair share. I have an entire bank slot (or maybe 3) devoted to pets, and nostalgia gear. If I ever get the paladin pants to drop off of the Baron? Yeah, I'm keeping them, since he never, ever, did that for me. The bastard.
I keep the things that I do, in my bank, because they have a rather large significance for me, Dustin. The man behind the screen. I thought I'd mention a few of them today to show you why, even though I'm not IN the Guardian Knights, I still count myself as one. And I count the people in Knights of Utopia as Guardian Knights as well. For me, Guardian Knights turned into something more than a silly (and tiny) insignificant guild on Alleria. It was family.
I have a fire crown from the first summer festival thing that Blizzard did. In order to get it, you have to go into all 3 of the opposing faction's cities and get a piece of their bonfire (or something similar, I'm posting from memory). The first time I did it, I did it alone, as Boon. Let me tell you, riding in as a paladin? Boy did everyone want a piece of me. But in the end, after numerous deaths, and let me tell you that the paladin bubble is NOT impervious to spit... F any of you who spit on me... I walked out with my crown. And then, everyone in GK wanted one. Since I had the experience, I led 2 or 3 more incursions into enemy territory, and there you go. Crowns for everyone. I keep mine to remember that sense of family, as we rode in on our mounts to storm the cities, and I remember, since I had my crown already, being bait. Mwahahaha. Suckers.
I have a tiny crimson whelpling. Every officer in the guild had one of these, mainly because I could farm them, they matched our guild colors, and they were (at least at the time) rare to get. And expensive! So I farmed them, each that was gifted to an officer during our induction ceremony, was actually earned rather than bought.
I still have the guild itself. Not for the tab, although I use it, but because WE are the Guardian Knights. Once a knight, always a knight, and I don't know that I could stand seeing someone else, a stranger, possibly walking past me with that title under their name. It's home to me, on Alleria, and I like that it'll always be there for the duration of my time here in Azeroth.
You may find that I'm a sentimental sap. I'm not too worried about it. I mean, if you read the tiny blurb about me that I wrote up, it even says I'm a nerd, I love Batman, etc. Do you really think I know what shame is? But I'd bet that for every person who reads this and thinks I'm odd, there are two who nod their head knowingly and start thinking of items THEY keep that have meaning to them.
If you look at my desk, you'll see a small grey plastic Cloud figure and a hand-drawn blue whelpling. These were sent to me by guildies from the GK because I loved them. The blue whelp, especially, has meaning because at the time, one didn't exist. Navya knew I always wanted a blue one (blue being my favorite color, why can't Blizz decide that paladins don't need purple stuff but blue stuff) so she drew one for me, and mailed it. When I finally did get one, appropriately enough, it was a gift from my best friend, Owaru. There's not a chance that my blue whelpling will ever be vendored or tossed out. Owaru's a Guardian Knight as truly as I am. Many of the Knights of Utopia are Guardian Knights. Most of them, in fact.
I don't have a lot of friends in real life. My job, teaching, doesn't lend itself to making friends (since they're half my age now). I'm not lonely at work, far from it, but still. I had a small circle of friends that, I came to believe, were unhealthy for me to be around (some very bitter people in there, and it's been my experience that the type of people you surround yourself with will be the type of person you become, if you're not already), and so I left them. Many of us play WoW for loot, or for leveling, but most of us? I think most of us play to socialize with people who we care about, regardless of where they live, since in essence we ALL live in Azeroth.
These players, these friends and family, are not forgotten. I may not have mentioned you here, and you may not even ever know that this blog exists, but I have a looooong memory, and if you've ever meant anything to me, you always do. Knights are friends, friends are Knights, and if there's one code that this paladin lives by, stands by, and believes in? It's...
Once a Knight, always a Knight.
Sentimental post? Sure, why not. The blogs I read are typically about HOW we play Warcraft, not WHY. I'm more original!
I keep the things that I do, in my bank, because they have a rather large significance for me, Dustin. The man behind the screen. I thought I'd mention a few of them today to show you why, even though I'm not IN the Guardian Knights, I still count myself as one. And I count the people in Knights of Utopia as Guardian Knights as well. For me, Guardian Knights turned into something more than a silly (and tiny) insignificant guild on Alleria. It was family.
I have a fire crown from the first summer festival thing that Blizzard did. In order to get it, you have to go into all 3 of the opposing faction's cities and get a piece of their bonfire (or something similar, I'm posting from memory). The first time I did it, I did it alone, as Boon. Let me tell you, riding in as a paladin? Boy did everyone want a piece of me. But in the end, after numerous deaths, and let me tell you that the paladin bubble is NOT impervious to spit... F any of you who spit on me... I walked out with my crown. And then, everyone in GK wanted one. Since I had the experience, I led 2 or 3 more incursions into enemy territory, and there you go. Crowns for everyone. I keep mine to remember that sense of family, as we rode in on our mounts to storm the cities, and I remember, since I had my crown already, being bait. Mwahahaha. Suckers.
I have a tiny crimson whelpling. Every officer in the guild had one of these, mainly because I could farm them, they matched our guild colors, and they were (at least at the time) rare to get. And expensive! So I farmed them, each that was gifted to an officer during our induction ceremony, was actually earned rather than bought.
I still have the guild itself. Not for the tab, although I use it, but because WE are the Guardian Knights. Once a knight, always a knight, and I don't know that I could stand seeing someone else, a stranger, possibly walking past me with that title under their name. It's home to me, on Alleria, and I like that it'll always be there for the duration of my time here in Azeroth.
You may find that I'm a sentimental sap. I'm not too worried about it. I mean, if you read the tiny blurb about me that I wrote up, it even says I'm a nerd, I love Batman, etc. Do you really think I know what shame is? But I'd bet that for every person who reads this and thinks I'm odd, there are two who nod their head knowingly and start thinking of items THEY keep that have meaning to them.
If you look at my desk, you'll see a small grey plastic Cloud figure and a hand-drawn blue whelpling. These were sent to me by guildies from the GK because I loved them. The blue whelp, especially, has meaning because at the time, one didn't exist. Navya knew I always wanted a blue one (blue being my favorite color, why can't Blizz decide that paladins don't need purple stuff but blue stuff) so she drew one for me, and mailed it. When I finally did get one, appropriately enough, it was a gift from my best friend, Owaru. There's not a chance that my blue whelpling will ever be vendored or tossed out. Owaru's a Guardian Knight as truly as I am. Many of the Knights of Utopia are Guardian Knights. Most of them, in fact.
I don't have a lot of friends in real life. My job, teaching, doesn't lend itself to making friends (since they're half my age now). I'm not lonely at work, far from it, but still. I had a small circle of friends that, I came to believe, were unhealthy for me to be around (some very bitter people in there, and it's been my experience that the type of people you surround yourself with will be the type of person you become, if you're not already), and so I left them. Many of us play WoW for loot, or for leveling, but most of us? I think most of us play to socialize with people who we care about, regardless of where they live, since in essence we ALL live in Azeroth.
These players, these friends and family, are not forgotten. I may not have mentioned you here, and you may not even ever know that this blog exists, but I have a looooong memory, and if you've ever meant anything to me, you always do. Knights are friends, friends are Knights, and if there's one code that this paladin lives by, stands by, and believes in? It's...
Once a Knight, always a Knight.
Sentimental post? Sure, why not. The blogs I read are typically about HOW we play Warcraft, not WHY. I'm more original!
Thursday, February 7, 2008
When worlds collide!
I started my MMO experiences with a little game called Final Fantasy XI. For any of you who are familiar with the game (and I don't mean a passing kind, but an actual "I played that" kind), you know that it really was a grind, there was a high elitist attitude about having the right equipment, and worst of all, it actually required some serious skill to accomplish much of the proper game mechanics.
Before you start in on defending WoW, or EQ2, note that I'm playing those and not FFXI. But the one thing, other than a very close sense of community with my linkshell, that I left behind in FFXI that I missed... were the group interactions. You had to have macros announcing what you were doing, and you had to be paying attention, in order to cast at the proper time (I was primarily a black mage, Taru's ftw!), or you'd mess up your group. And in FFXI, messing up the group could easily mean death at any one point in time.
I hear about this new MMO, World of Warcraft, and I think, hey, I'll try that. I was familiar with Warcraft, played WC2 and enjoyed it, so I figured, what the hey. When I tried it, at first, I honestly didn't like it. The graphics were okay, I wasn't thrown off by the cartoony look. It was that it seemed to be a button masher, where you'd do allright if you just kept hitting your skills, and you really didn't NEED a group to play it.
After spending hours sometimes looking for a group to try to gain 1/4 of a level (I mean, c'mon, I only had 6 hours to play, needed to hurry if I was going to get that 1/4), I liked that idea. Plus, you could be more than 4 races, and they even had FACTIONS. There were players you could actually fight and kill!
So I switched, and I have loved WoW ever since. The only things WoW does NOT have to offer, and even the most rabid of us WoW'ers must be honest in admitting it, is team mechanics for small dungeons. In raids, I understand, there is an aspect of "mess up and you kill us all". In dungeons, not so much. Heroics maybe. But it really didn't matter, in questing and such, if I healed you before you attacked, or after, or if I ice-bolted the mob before you cheap shotted.
So I try Everquest 2. It has some things that WoW doesn't, but also lacks some things that WoW does right. You could read this as a review of the two but it's not my intention to compare them. They're different games for different flavors of gamer.
What Everquest does right:
Skillchains. Nuff said. Being able to play off of what another character is doing and make it more effective is awesome. I love that sense of "team" in that what I do can imbue what someone else does and we become more effective by working together and coordinating our attacks.
Crafting. I love the crafting in it. It's more complex than "get your mats, click the button, watch for status to finish" like WoW does. You skillup in crafting and it allows you to learn more recipes. You can make upgrades to player skills, you can make items for player housing, weapons, armor, etc. When you've decorated your own little instanced apartment with things you've actually gathered and made, I don't know... there's a sense of accomplishment there.
Character design. You won't have to look the same as all of the other "good" races, or "evil" races. There is enough difference to make a unique look if you want one, and if you don't, you can individualize your character's class far more than WoW offers. (WoW does offer some specialization but it seems more designed for what you want to do, there's a PvP spec, a PvE spec, a raiding spec, etc. in WoW in general). From all appearances, EQ2 has that but also some more individualized means by which you can DPS/Heal/Tank. Given that my experience is limited, this is based more on what I think I understand about the character advancement system rather than actual experience with it.
What WoW does right:
Solo'ing and accomplishments. You can jump onto WoW and play for an hour, and accomplish quite a bit in that time. While I think it's a simpler game in that it requires less to play, I don't think it's a "Boon hit button, Boon kill!". There is a lot of thought put into WoW, both in lore and in design, and I don't think it should be written off as a "children's version" of an MMO. It's got plenty of content. While the game can be simple, it's entertaining and a lot of fun.
System Requirement. It isn't taxing on your PC so you can play it on a much lesser system than Everquest 2. When I alt-tab out of EQ2, even with my rather nice computer, I lag considerably on everything, and have even locked up a time or two. Not saying that's Everquest doing it, necessarily, but I can alt-tab on WoW easily all the time. Plus I get a higher FPS in WoW.
Longevity. I've played the game for 3 years (has it really been 3 years) and I don't see myself quitting it anytime soon. While I may look into other MMO's and try them (hence the EQ2 experiment), it'd take some pretty solid design to pull me from WoW. Wasn't so hard to pull me from FFXI.
And I'm spent. If I spend all evening writing this rather than playing, what's the point!?
TO THE GAMES!
Before you start in on defending WoW, or EQ2, note that I'm playing those and not FFXI. But the one thing, other than a very close sense of community with my linkshell, that I left behind in FFXI that I missed... were the group interactions. You had to have macros announcing what you were doing, and you had to be paying attention, in order to cast at the proper time (I was primarily a black mage, Taru's ftw!), or you'd mess up your group. And in FFXI, messing up the group could easily mean death at any one point in time.
I hear about this new MMO, World of Warcraft, and I think, hey, I'll try that. I was familiar with Warcraft, played WC2 and enjoyed it, so I figured, what the hey. When I tried it, at first, I honestly didn't like it. The graphics were okay, I wasn't thrown off by the cartoony look. It was that it seemed to be a button masher, where you'd do allright if you just kept hitting your skills, and you really didn't NEED a group to play it.
After spending hours sometimes looking for a group to try to gain 1/4 of a level (I mean, c'mon, I only had 6 hours to play, needed to hurry if I was going to get that 1/4), I liked that idea. Plus, you could be more than 4 races, and they even had FACTIONS. There were players you could actually fight and kill!
So I switched, and I have loved WoW ever since. The only things WoW does NOT have to offer, and even the most rabid of us WoW'ers must be honest in admitting it, is team mechanics for small dungeons. In raids, I understand, there is an aspect of "mess up and you kill us all". In dungeons, not so much. Heroics maybe. But it really didn't matter, in questing and such, if I healed you before you attacked, or after, or if I ice-bolted the mob before you cheap shotted.
So I try Everquest 2. It has some things that WoW doesn't, but also lacks some things that WoW does right. You could read this as a review of the two but it's not my intention to compare them. They're different games for different flavors of gamer.
What Everquest does right:
Skillchains. Nuff said. Being able to play off of what another character is doing and make it more effective is awesome. I love that sense of "team" in that what I do can imbue what someone else does and we become more effective by working together and coordinating our attacks.
Crafting. I love the crafting in it. It's more complex than "get your mats, click the button, watch for status to finish" like WoW does. You skillup in crafting and it allows you to learn more recipes. You can make upgrades to player skills, you can make items for player housing, weapons, armor, etc. When you've decorated your own little instanced apartment with things you've actually gathered and made, I don't know... there's a sense of accomplishment there.
Character design. You won't have to look the same as all of the other "good" races, or "evil" races. There is enough difference to make a unique look if you want one, and if you don't, you can individualize your character's class far more than WoW offers. (WoW does offer some specialization but it seems more designed for what you want to do, there's a PvP spec, a PvE spec, a raiding spec, etc. in WoW in general). From all appearances, EQ2 has that but also some more individualized means by which you can DPS/Heal/Tank. Given that my experience is limited, this is based more on what I think I understand about the character advancement system rather than actual experience with it.
What WoW does right:
Solo'ing and accomplishments. You can jump onto WoW and play for an hour, and accomplish quite a bit in that time. While I think it's a simpler game in that it requires less to play, I don't think it's a "Boon hit button, Boon kill!". There is a lot of thought put into WoW, both in lore and in design, and I don't think it should be written off as a "children's version" of an MMO. It's got plenty of content. While the game can be simple, it's entertaining and a lot of fun.
System Requirement. It isn't taxing on your PC so you can play it on a much lesser system than Everquest 2. When I alt-tab out of EQ2, even with my rather nice computer, I lag considerably on everything, and have even locked up a time or two. Not saying that's Everquest doing it, necessarily, but I can alt-tab on WoW easily all the time. Plus I get a higher FPS in WoW.
Longevity. I've played the game for 3 years (has it really been 3 years) and I don't see myself quitting it anytime soon. While I may look into other MMO's and try them (hence the EQ2 experiment), it'd take some pretty solid design to pull me from WoW. Wasn't so hard to pull me from FFXI.
And I'm spent. If I spend all evening writing this rather than playing, what's the point!?
TO THE GAMES!
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